Cockney Rebel Personality Profile

Garry Johnson

Portrait Of The Artist As A Consumer


"I wish I`d been born a orphan or was an abandoned baby found in a shop doorway because having `selfish parents` fucked me up.
They ruined my childhood and to be honest screwed up most of my adult life - but what can you do about it?"

It was a roller-coaster ride with far more highs then lows but I enjoyed every minute of it because I never let things get me down.

But now is the time to get off.


These are the Records, TV Shows, Films and people that helped me to defy the odds and have a what I thought was a `Happy Life`.

I am a proud Atheist but when it comes to music I am a devout Catholic.


Song That Is To Good For Any List - ZIGGY STARDUST by DAVID BOWIE


Top 50 Singles:

1. Anarchy In The UK - The Sex Pistols
2. Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division
3. White Man In Hammersmith Palais - The Clash
4. Someone Like You - Adele
5. No Woman No Cry - Bob Marley
6. Eton Rifles - The Jam
7. Fairytale Of New York - The Pogues
8. Live Forever - Oasis
9. Nothing Compares To U - Sinead O`Connor
10. Tomorrow Belongs To Me - Alex Harvey Band
11. Under Pressure - David Bowie & Queen
12. Pretty Vacant - The Sex Pistols
13. All The Young Dudes - Mott The Hoople
14. Strange Town - The Jam
15. Absolute Beginners - David Bowie
16. Teenage Kicks - The Undertones
17. Bankrobber - The Clash
18. Starman - David Bowie
19. Oliver`s Army - Elvis Costello
20. Walk On The Wild Side - Lou Reed
21. Come Up And See Me Make Me Smile - Cockney Rebel
22. School`s Out - Alice Cooper
23. Substitute - The Who
24. Wonderwall - Oasis
25. Smells Like Teen Spirit - Nirvana
26. Angels - Robbie Williams
27. Sweet Child Of Mine - Guns And Roses
28. Revolution - The Beatles
29. Creep - Radiohead
30. Saturday Night Beneath The Plastic Palm Trees - The Leighton Buzzards
31. My Way - The Sex Pistols
32. The Killing Of Georgie - Rod Stewart
33. Three Lions - Baddiel & Skinner and The Lightning Seeds
34. It Hurt So Good - Susan Cadogan
35. Skinhead Moonstomp - Symarip
36. You Cant Always Get What You Want - The Rolling Stones
37. Rebel Rebel - David Bowie
38. Uptown Top Ranking - Althea & Donna
39. My Way - Frank Sinatra
40. Silly Games - Janet Kay
41. Every Breath You Take - The Police
42. Born To Run - Bruce Sprinsteen
43. Golden Years - David Bowie
44. Stay With Me - Rod Stewart and The Faces
45. Up The Junction - Squeeze
46. Everybody Hurts - REM
47. Waterloo Sunset - The Kinks
48. Virginia Plain - Roxy Music
49. Life On Mars - David Bowie
50. Suburban Rebels - The Business


Television Top 20:
1. Minder
2. Only Fools And Horses
3. The Office
4. The Inbetweeners
5. The Simpsons
6. Gavin And  Stacey
7. Knowing Me Knowing You (Alan Partridge)
8. Fawlty Towers
9. Have I Got News For You
10. Mock The Week
11. Never Mind The Buzzcocks
12. I`m Alan Partridge
13. Eight Out Of Ten Cats
14. The Sweeney
15. Benidorm
16. Would I Lie To You?
17. Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads
18. The Apprentice
19. Shooting Stars
20. The Harry Enfield Show
21. Little Britain
22. Porridge
23. Extras
24. Dragon`s Den
25. Coronation Street / great comic moments


Sex Symbols:

Superior to all Others - To Good For a List KATE MOSS
and Julie Johnson in her black open crotch fishnet body stocking.

1. Debbie Harry (Blondie heyday)
2. Wendy James (Transvision Vamp)
3. Joanne Guest
4. Kimberley Davies (Neighbours 1990s)
5. Daniella Westbrook (pre-nose job)
6. Patsy Kensit (pre-fat ankles)
7. Amanda Holden
8. Ulrika Jonsson
9. Susan George
10. Britt Ekland (Rod Stewart era)
11. Nina Carter (Page 3)
12. Lindsay Lohan (Blonde prison mugshot)
13. Ola Jordan
14. Denise Van Outen
15. Twiggy (1960s - cheekbones to die for)
16. Annie Jones (Neighbours 1990s)
17. Suzanne Mitzi (Page 3)
18. Angie Best (when married to George)
19. Jilly Johnson (Page 3)
20. Angie Bowie (Ziggy Stardust era)

***1989-2005 "Julie Johnson"


Hitler`s Disciples:
1. Pervert pimp richard grimson
2. Jean Marsh
3. Charles Alfred Johnson
4. Joyce and Tony Taylor
5. Ian Huntley and  Myra Hyndley
6. Sally Prevost (Griffin) and Paul Wellings
7. Extreme Militant muslims, Zionist jews, Born Again Christians
8. Neil Kinnock
9. Tony Blair
10. Gordon Brown
11. Arthur Scargill
12. John Hunter
13. Nipper Read
14. Bertie Smalls
15. Winston Churchill
16. Gerry Adams
17. Jordan
18. Spurs
19. Sharon Shoesmith
20. Social Workers


Bands:
1. The Sex Pistols
2. The Jam
3. The Clash
4. The Stone Roses
5. Oasis
6. Rod Stewart And The Faces
7. Cockney Rebel
8. The Beatles
9. The Who
10. The Buzzcocks
11. Roxy Music
12. The Rolling Stones
13. Mott The Hoople
14. Blondie
15. The Velvet Underground
16. Madness
17. U2
18. Blur

Albums:
1. The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars - David Bowie
2. Never Mind The Bollocks - The Sex Pistols
3. Setting Sons - The Jam
4. Transformer - Lou Reed


Heroes:
1. David Bowie
2. George Best
3. Rod Stewart
4. Paul Weller
5. The Kray Twins
6. The Great Train Robbers
7. Al Capone
8. Guy Fawkes
9. Bob Marley
10. Johnny Rotten


Fictional Heroes:
1. Arthur Daley
2. Del Boy
3. Robin Hood
4. Jesse James
5. Homer Simpson
6. Alan Partridge
7. David Brent
8. Jay Cartwright

Songwriters:
1. David Bowie
2. Paul Weller
3. Bob Dylan
4. Bob Marley
5. Lou Reed
6. Noel Gallagher
7. Ian Hunter
8. Elvis Costello

Sporting Heroes:
1. George Best
2. Mike Tyson
3. Alex Hurricane Higgins
4. Bobby Moore
5. Steve Ovett

Fashion:
1. Mod
2. Skinhead
3. Punk (attitude not the clothes)

Funny Fellas:
1. Frankie Boyle
2. Ricky Gervais
3. Jimmy Carr
4. Frank Skinner
5. Jonathan Ross
6. Paul Merton
7. Dame Edna Everage
8. Micky Flannagan


Actors:
1. Arthur Daley
2. Ray Winstone
3. Michael Caine
4. James Cagney
5. Timothy Spall
6. Danny Dyer

Films:
1. The Man Who Fell To Earth
2. The Long Good Friday
3. The Krays
4. Lock Stock
5. Basildon Babe starring Julie Taylor Johnson***
6. Get Carter
7. Villian
8. Essex Boys
9. A Clockwork Orange
10. Scum
11. Football Factory
12. The Italian Job
13. Outlaw
14. Green Street
15. Angels With Dirty Faces
16. Quadrophenia
17. Toy Story
18. Sexy Beast
19. Lady Sings The Blues
20. Silence Of The Lambs


Songs To Play At My Funeral:
1. My Death - David Bowie
2. Rock`n`Roll Suicide - David Bowie
3. Angels - Robbie Williams

How Many People Have I Truly Loved In My Life:
1. Sam Johnson
2. Adam Johnson
3. Lucy Johnson
***1989-2005 Julie Johnson


Food:
1. Marmite On Toast
2. Peanut Butter Crispy Rolls
3. Tuna Fish and Crab Sticks
4. Pie and Mash
5. Boost Bars
6. McDonalds Strawberry Milkshake

Drink:
1. Lucozade
2. Tea
3. Pils lager
4. Vodka
5. Red Bull

Substances:
1. Speed
2. Cocaine

Personal Beliefs:
1. Honesty is the best policy
2. Always support the underdog
3. Never forgive and never forget
4. The best fueds are taken to the grave

Life Changing Incidents:
1. The best thing I ever did in my life was getting Married because it gave me 15 years of happiness plus SAM, ADAM and LUCY
2. The worst thing I ever did was getting Married - I got hurt, I was betrayed and I lost my daughter, house and money.

With hindsight:
1, I should not have invited both parents to my Wedding,
2. I should have behaved at school and got a Education

Greatest Sayings:
1. "I wish I knew then what I Know Now"
2. "Never forgive and never forget"



The End